In light of Bishop Zubik’s recent call of a new class into the diocesan Deacon Formation Program, here is a look at one of the men currently serving in this ministry.
Deacon Ralph Bachner
Ordination date: June 26, 1999
Parish assignment: Saint Kilian Parish, Adams/Cranberry Townships
Employment: Pastoral associate and director of evangelization
Family: Married, 2 children, 3 grandchildren
Education: Duquesne University: bachelor’s degree in philosophy and master’s degree in religious education
What initially attracted you to the diaconate?
I find it interesting that the first deacons were chosen by the community. That is truthfully how my call to the diaconate arose. A few priests, good friends and a loving wife asked me to think about exploring the diaconate. With only a week to spare, I applied for the program. Because of their promptings and encouragement and through my own prayer and discernment, I began the journey. The calling that began as subtle encouragement became stronger with each passing day.
What stands out for you as a highlight of your ministry?
It’s hard to pick just one, but one of the most moving experiences I’ve had occurred several years ago, on Ash Wednesday 2007. I had been regularly visiting a parishioner who was dying from ALS (amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, or Lou Gehrig’s disease). The disease was progressing rapidly, and his body was shutting down. I offered to stop that Ash Wednesday to visit and give ashes to him and his family. He was unable to speak, but his eyes spoke volumes. I used the words “Remember that you are dust and to dust you shall return.” As I gazed into his eyes and he into mine, we both knew the words I was speaking would become a reality much sooner than for most receiving ashes that day. Tom died a month later. I think back on that moment each Ash Wednesday. Our God walks with us and is present to us during those fragile moments of our lives, drawing us always closer to Himself.
What motivates you to a ministry of service?
Love of God and love of God’s people—it’s that simple. In ministry, you simply need to die to yourself so that it is Christ who lives in you. If you can get out of the way, Jesus will work in you and through you. My motivation is love.
What is your favorite part of being a deacon? Why?
As a deacon you find yourself privileged to be present at intimate moments in the lives of those you serve. There are joyful occasions like baptisms, communions, confirmations, the rites of initiation at the Easter Vigil, and marriages as well as the challenging times people have— illness, marital problems, addictions, and loss of a loved one. There are also enlightening times of preparing children for the sacraments of Eucharist and Reconciliation, marriage enrichment, RCIA, and adult faith formation, or leading a group of men to retreats at St. Paul of the Cross Retreat Center. How blessed to share in the faith life of others and walk with them on the journey of life. It’s also very special to be involved in the sacramental life of our family, such as baptizing our grandchildren and being involved with their faith formation. Any time our granddaughter, Charlotte, enters our home she always blesses herself with holy water we have in a font by the door. It has also been very important to work so closely with my wife, Susan, for many years in the parish. She recently retired, but still remains active with the CCD program at St. Kilian.
How does someone know if he has a vocation to become a deacon?
The vocation of deacon is a natural extension of who you are as a person. While ordination will give you grace to assist you in ministry, it will not suddenly change the fundamental values of your life. While every call to a vocation is different, there should be signs of being a person of prayer, service and compassion as well as involvement in areas of parish life.
What advice do you have for someone who might be considering the diaconate?
Have good discussions with your wife, if you are married, your adult children, your pastor and other priests. Ask for their honest thoughts about your interest in the diaconate. If you know someone who is a deacon, meet with him and his wife. These are all valuable ways to begin the discernment of this vocation.
How has your ministry enhanced your spiritual life – your personal relationship with Jesus?
An understatement to say the least! The diaconate has guided and nurtured my spiritual life over the past 18-plus years and helped my relationship with Jesus to become more intimate and my prayer life more consistent. Serving as a deacon is a not-so-subtle reminder that we are all called to serve. The good Sisters of Saint Francis would be pleased to know that the Catechism they taught us in those early years is still a guide for my life. “Why did God make me? God made me to know Him, to love Him, and to serve Him in this world, and to be happy with Him forever in heaven.” Answering God’s call to be a deacon has deepened my response to those three purposes and set me on fire for the fourth.
In what ways has your personal or professional life been enhanced by being a deacon? What effect has it had on your family life?
I am blessed to be both assigned to my home parish and employed in the parish (which is sometimes but not always the case for a deacon; most deacons are employed in secular jobs). This dual role is most times seamless and, in much the same way as a priest assigned to a parish, allows me to immerse myself completely in this ministry. This situation enables me to be most beneficial and effective in assisting the pastor and, more importantly, providing ministry to fellow parishioners. Since my children are older, my wife and I are able to serve in this ministry together at times, and the diaconate has become a way of life. For example, last week, after looking where I could schedule a meeting in an already busy month, I said to Susan, “I’m sorry but this was the only day I could fit this in.” Without hesitation she said, “That’s OK, that’s what we do.” Her words are true: being a deacon is at the heart of who I am and who we are as a couple.
What saint(s) do you look to for inspiration? Why?
Each saint offers some unique insight into living a holy life, so there is not one saint in particular. Honestly, I cannot get enough of the saints. I am constantly reading about them and watching movies on their lives. It helps me to understand that each of us has a special role that God has given only to us. We each play an integral part in God’s love story. The saints offer us glimpses into leading holy lives: Philip Neri – a joyful saint of compassion and kindness; Faustina – imploring us to seek God’s mercy; Rita – a prayerful person, inspiring meditation on Christ crucified; Therese of Lisieux - her simplicity and practicality of her approach to the spiritual life; Augustine – his overcoming of vices. My list goes on and on and on. There is a wealth of direction and inspiration from the saints.
What excites you most about being On Mission for the Church Alive!?
Bishop Zubik has said that to be
On Mission for the Church Alive! means quite simply that we need to be excited about our faith. We need to be excited about our relationship with Jesus. We need to be eager to show it, and we need to be eager to share it. Too often we can lose focus as a church, as a diocese, as a parish, and as a deacon. This initiative is a wonderful means to return to the primary mission of the Church, which is found in the words of Bishop Zubik: “Learn Jesus. Love Jesus. Live Jesus.” I look forward to the positive changes that will bring about greater opportunities for faith formation, service to the community and enhancing the spiritual lives of the people of our diocese and our parishes.
Anything else you’d like to add?
I also do an e-mail prayer chain for the parish. We have almost 200 members on that list who pray for the needs of family and friends. And in the past several months our parish has subscribed to Formed.org, which gives parishioners access to online eBooks, audio files, movies and studies. Besides having them access these materials from their home and offering some on-site programs, I wanted to try something a bit different, so we do an online book club where the participants all read a book and have the opportunity to discuss it online. It has been slow in getting started, but the folks who have joined in are giving a lot of positive feedback. These two ministries can also be found on a little blog site I began at
www.prayerpaths.com. I will also be involved in a new men’s ministry this fall at St. Kilian titled “That Man is You!”
For more information about diaconal ministry and the diocesan Deacon Formation Program: deacons@diopitt.org or 412-456-3124.